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Choosing the Right College

How to Know if a Coach is Serious About Recruiting You

One of the most challenging aspects of recruiting is interpreting coach interest. Many families mistake polite engagement for serious recruiting interest, leading to disappointment and poor planning. Here's how to read the signs and determine whether a coach genuinely wants you on their team.

Signs of Genuine Interest

High-Priority Communication

What genuine interest looks like:

  • Personal phone calls initiated by the coach
  • Text messages with specific questions about your games/performances
  • Quick response times (within 24-48 hours)
  • Follow-up questions about your answers
  • References to specific plays or performances they've seen

Red flag: Generic emails that could be sent to anyone

Specific Knowledge About You

Coaches who are serious know:

  • Your current statistics and recent performances
  • Your position and how you fit their system
  • Your academic interests and intended major
  • Your timeline for making decisions
  • Details about your high school or club program

Test: Ask specific questions about their program to see if they know yours

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Investment of Time and Resources

Serious coaches:

  • Visit your games or arrange to watch you play
  • Invite you for official visits (with travel expenses covered)
  • Include you in camp invitations for evaluation
  • Coordinate with academic departments about your interests
  • Connect you with current players from your area or position

Program-Specific Conversations

Genuine interest includes:

  • Discussion of specific role you'd play on their team
  • Academic programs that match your interests
  • Facility tours and program culture explanations
  • Timeline discussions for commitment decisions
  • Scholarship specifics (if they're recruiting with aid)

Signs of Polite Engagement

Generic Communication

Warning signs:

  • Mass emails that don't mention you specifically
  • Standard camp invitations sent to large lists
  • Form letters with your name inserted
  • Generic social media follows or likes
  • Auto-reply responses to your emails

Vague or Delayed Responses

Red flags:

  • Week-plus response times to your communications
  • Non-specific answers to direct questions
  • Avoiding discussions about your role or fit
  • Referring you to assistants for all communication
  • No follow-up after initial contact

Limited Investment

Signs they're not serious:

  • Only communicate when you initiate contact
  • Never seen you play in person or on video
  • Invite to expensive camps but don't offer evaluation
  • Don't ask about other schools you're considering
  • Avoid timeline discussions about decisions

Questions That Reveal True Interest

Direct Assessment Questions

  1. "How do you see me fitting into your program?"

    • Serious coaches have specific answers
    • Vague responses indicate limited interest
  2. "What's your timeline for recruiting my position?"

    • Genuine interest includes you in their timeline
    • Delays may indicate you're a backup option
  3. "Have you had a chance to watch my highlight video?"

    • Serious coaches will reference specific plays
    • Generic responses suggest they haven't watched

Program-Specific Questions

  1. "What would my academic path look like at your school?"

    • Serious coaches coordinate with academic departments
    • Shows they're thinking about your full college experience
  2. "How many players are you recruiting for my position?"

    • Honest answers indicate transparency
    • Vague responses may hide that you're far down their list

Commitment Questions

  1. "What would a scholarship offer look like for someone with my profile?"
    • Serious coaches discuss specifics (within NCAA rules)
    • Vague promises indicate limited commitment

Reading Between the Lines

Communication Frequency and Quality

High interest:

  • Regular check-ins during your season
  • Personal messages about your performances
  • Invitations to program events
  • Introduction to other staff members

Low interest:

  • Only responds when you reach out
  • Generic updates about their program
  • No mention of your recent games or achievements
  • Limited to email communication

Body Language and Tone (In-Person/Video Calls)

Positive signs:

  • Engaged eye contact and active listening
  • Specific questions about your goals and interests
  • Enthusiasm when discussing how you'd fit
  • Time investment in longer conversations

Warning signs:

  • Distracted behavior during conversations
  • Generic enthusiasm that seems rehearsed
  • Short, formal interactions
  • Quick to end phone calls or meetings

The Recruiting Priority Scale

Tier 1: Must-Have Recruits

How they treat you:

  • Multiple personal contacts per month
  • Official visit invitations early in process
  • Direct scholarship discussions
  • Introduction to academic advisors
  • Regular game attendance or video requests

Tier 2: Strong Interest

How they treat you:

  • Monthly contact with personal touches
  • Camp invitations with evaluation focus
  • Academic program discussions
  • References to specific fit in their system
  • Timeline discussions for decisions

Tier 3: On the Radar

How they treat you:

  • Quarterly check-ins or updates
  • Generic camp invitations
  • Requests for updated information
  • Polite but non-committal responses
  • "Keep in touch" messaging

Tier 4: Database Contact

How they treat you:

  • Rare or auto-generated communication
  • Mass marketing materials
  • No personal knowledge of your abilities
  • Delayed or generic responses
  • No investment in relationship building

Common Misinterpretations

Overestimating Interest

Families often mistake:

  • Camp invitations for serious interest (often mass marketing)
  • Social media follows for recruiting (standard practice)
  • Polite responses for genuine interest
  • Generic compliments for specific evaluation
  • Future possibility language for current interest

Underestimating Interest

Families might miss:

  • Quiet, consistent communication that builds over time
  • Academic department coordination showing serious planning
  • Assistant coach engagement as head coach direction
  • Current player outreach as coach-initiated
  • Unofficial visit encouragement as evaluation opportunity

Red Flags That Indicate Low Priority

Communication Red Flags

  • Takes weeks to respond to your emails
  • Never initiates contact or conversation
  • Avoids specific questions about your fit or role
  • References generic program benefits only
  • Doesn't know your current statistics or performance

Behavior Red Flags

  • Never seen you play despite multiple opportunities
  • Doesn't ask questions about your other recruiting options
  • Avoids timeline discussions for your decisions
  • Refers you to camps but offers no evaluation feedback
  • Shows little knowledge of your academic interests

Process Red Flags

  • No official visit invitation despite mutual interest
  • Limited staff involvement in your recruitment
  • No academic coordination or department introductions
  • Vague scholarship discussions despite direct questions
  • No current player introductions or testimonials

How to Get Honest Assessment

Direct but Respectful Approach

"Coach, I'm trying to plan my recruiting timeline and college list strategically. Can you give me an honest assessment of where I stand in your recruiting process?"

Specific Timeline Questions

"When do you expect to make decisions about your recruiting class for my position, and how does that affect our communication timeline?"

Comparative Questions

"How does my profile compare to players you've recruited successfully for this position in recent years?"

What to Do Based on Interest Level

If They're Serious (Tier 1-2)

  • Prioritize relationship building with consistent updates
  • Schedule official visit if offered
  • Engage academically with their school
  • Ask detailed questions about program culture and expectations
  • Consider their timeline in your decision-making process

If Interest is Moderate (Tier 3)

  • Continue regular updates but don't over-invest emotionally
  • Focus energy on higher-priority programs
  • Use as backup option in your planning
  • Maintain relationship without major time investment

If Interest is Low (Tier 4)

  • Minimal time investment in the relationship
  • Focus efforts elsewhere on more promising opportunities
  • Keep door open with occasional updates
  • Don't decline immediately - situations can change

Managing Multiple Interest Levels

Portfolio Approach

  • 2-3 high-interest programs where you're clearly wanted
  • 4-5 moderate-interest programs for backup options
  • Several low-interest programs for safety and possibility
  • Academic safety schools where you can afford to attend

Communication Strategy

High-interest programs: Weekly to bi-weekly updates Moderate-interest programs: Monthly updates Low-interest programs: Quarterly updates Stay organized with spreadsheet or CRM system

The Bottom Line

Genuine recruiting interest is specific, consistent, and involves investment of the coach's time and resources. If you're unsure about a coach's interest level, ask direct questions and pay attention to their actions, not just their words.

Trust your instincts:

  • Coaches who want you make it clear through actions
  • Consistent, specific communication indicates genuine interest
  • Investment of time and resources shows serious evaluation
  • Vague promises and delayed responses suggest lower priority

Remember: It's better to focus your energy on coaches who clearly want you than to waste time trying to convince coaches who don't. Your time and emotional energy are valuable - invest them wisely.

For guidance on what to do when coaches show genuine interest, see our article on What to Do After a Coach Replies.

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